Genetically Engineered Fish

No, this post is not about the zebra danios that they put jellyfish dye in to glow under blacklight. Ok, well it is, but in a more fun typical college student sort of way. After seeing "Elf", which is your typical feel good Christmas movie, we all went and hung out at someone's house like we usually do. I think it's an unwritten college student rule that you can't come home before midnight. Anyway, we were sitting there discussing fish tanks and stuff and we got into a conversation that segued into New Years plans and past drinking parties held at OU. We were talking about making spiked jello in a 5 gallon bucket. Like 5 gallons of vodka and jello in a 5 gallon bucket. Which then led to a discussion on beer and what is good and how there actually is good cheap beer. Which then led to the discussion about how we chould genetically engineer a fish that "makes beer." I know, it sounds crazy, and there was no alcohol involved. Also keep in mind that anything said is hypothetically speaking.

So you have this fish that lives in beer. The only upfront cost is the 5 gallons or so of beer to fill the tank and adding a tap to the tank. The fish breathes the oxygen in the beer and blows CO2 out of its gills to keep the beer carbonated. It's a genius idea, and marketable to college students everywhere! I then started really thinking, and thinking about the 2 huge goldfish I have, I realized that really there would be some scum in the bottom of your beer tank. The last time I checked, fish poo, and poo A LOT! We thought that somehow we could make the amount of fish poo determine how stout the beer was, if it was like Guiness or like Natty Light. That would be determined by the amount of fish and how often the tank was "cleaned." Obviously the nastier the tank looked, the more Guiness-like the beer was and the cleaner the tank, the more piss-in-a-can-like the beer was. But if you think, 5 gallons of Guiness, that's really dark, and all fish were made to look at. That's where the glo-fish come in handy. Simply replace your tank light with a black light, and you can see the fish swim around in their own beer. All this was said just so the next time you crack open that bottle of Guiness you look at the dark yummy goodness and think"Mmmm....fish shit....."